Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN McCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: You betcha he crossed the road, but let's not talk about that, let's talk about energy policy, and how gosh darn hard it is for a middle-class hockey mom to manage the budget of the only state in America with a massive surplus, especially while surrounded by countless Russian and Canadian chickens we have to keep an eye on.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken...What is your definition of crossing?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain... alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens un til we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

Quote of the Week...

Tom Bergeron from Dancing with the Stars while holding an earring:

"You know, on Edyta this is a whole costume!"

Who is She?

No, this is not a late Halloween post. This is simply my neice being one of her many different personalities. This time she happened to be a ghost. Other times, she's Yoda.


The first time I saw her as Yoda, she was walking around all bent over using a stick as her cane. I asked her if she was an old decrepit woman and she replied "No, I'm Yoda!"

There is never a dull moment when she's around!

Help Needed!

Friends! My cousin and her husband (Deidra and Steve Augade) are in the process of trying to adopt and are looking for anyone and everyone who can possibly help them out. Here are directions from my cousin on ways you can recommend them to possible birth mothers who are considering placing their child up for adoption:

There are several ways this can be done (in addition to raving about our great qualities):

1) Anyone can view our LDS Family Services profile at: www.itsaboutlove.org/profile (then type steveanddeidra)

2)We also have a profile on www.parentprofiles.com , enter ID#23359. They may contact us through this site as well.

3)They can view our blog at www.stevedeidrazack.blogspot.com. My email address is referenced under my blog profile.

4) Our LDS Family Services social worker can be contacted at 801-706-7654. Her name is Pam Taylor and she is more than happy to take calls.

If any of you know of anyone you could recommend or would like to help spread the word, or if you just have questions in general, please feel free to comment on this board or contact Deidra directly.

I appreciate all your help! If nothing else, please keep them in your prayers. We would not only like a child to find a loving home but we would also like Deidra and Steve to find the joy of having another child!

FTC: Italy

Buongiorno! Yesterday was our fourth meeting of the Finer Things Club. We ate all things Italian, including:

Pasta (spaghetti, ravioli, lasagna)
Bread (Italian garlic bread)
Biscotti (Limone flavor)
Dessert (Real Italian Ice)

It was absolutely delicious (and this coming from a girl who doesn't really like Italian food!)



You may notice that our special guest (the boss) did not make an appearance this month! I'm pretty sure he was scared off last time.

Don't forget to join us next month for FTC: Sweden

Working out with Jillian...

Many of you probably know of my difficutly with working out and eating right. I guess you could say that I'm a pretty lazy person when it comes to these two things because when I get home from work each night I generally want to sit on my butt and do nothing. Cereal is my best friend. I'd eat it for breakfast, lunch and dinner if I could - mainly so I don't have to think about what to make.

Well, over the past five years I have (sadly) gained about 20 pounds. Every day I look at myself in the mirror and think "gosh, what has happened to you?" I wouldn't say that I am fat, but I am far from looking the way I would like to look. About a year ago I starting driving to my parent's twice a week so I could use their treadmill. I have absolutely no desire to buy a gym membership because 1) they're a total rip off and 2) I'd never use it because I find it slightly disturbing that other people can watch me workout. So, I thought using my parent's treadmill would be a great way for me to start into a better workout routine. It didn't help much because 1) I still wasn't eating right and 2) on the days I wasn't going to my parent's, I still wasn't workout out. I managed to maintain my weight over the year (fluctuating only 1-2 pounds), but I knew I needed something that would really push me to lose those few unwanted pounds.

Bring in Jillian Michaels.

Last month I got an email promoting Jillian Michaels workout DVDs. I knew Jillian from "The Biggest Loser" and knew her videos would probably kick my butt. So, I decided to buy the 5 DVD package for $19.95. Included with this was a one month free subscription to her online weight loss program. Seeing as it was free, I signed up.

It has now been 22 days since I have started this program and it has benefitted me in numerous ways. The first is that she plans out my meals for me every week! I have been eating so much better the last few weeks and I can definitely tell a difference in how I feel because of it. I've limited my sugar intake and have kept my meals to small portion sizes. And I have even been trying some new recipes (some of which made me gag but others which were delicious!)

I've also begun exercising for 45 minutes every night after work, following the workout plan she has also provided for me. I can tell a difference there as well and I feel SO much better after a nice hard workout. But the thing that is bothering me, is that I have only lost 2 pounds in 22 days! I feel like I am either doing something wrong or else I'm just building up so much muscle that the weight is deceiving. I'm not sure which is true.

I just have to say that her program has been just what I need for my personality because I don't have to think about what I want to eat or what exercises I should do. I can go home from work, look at my personal workout checklist and get to work. All the mental effort (other than doing the workout) is taken out of the equation. I love it!!

Now I have 7 days to figure out if I want to stay on her plan or cancel. We'll see how it goes!

Autumn Glazed Pork Chops

I made this meal last night for dinner and it was so delicious that I thought I'd share the recipe with everyone. This is from the Jillian Michael's weight loss program I'm on (see other post for more info. on this).

Autumn Glazed Pork Chops

Ingredients:
4 boneless porkchops
1/4 tsp black ground pepper
1/4 cup apple cider
1/2 cup cranberry sauce
2 tbl honey
2 tbl orange juice concentrate
1/4 tsp ground ginger
1/8 tsp ground nutmeg

Instructions:
Spray a large nonstick skillet with nonstick coating. Heat over medium-high heat. Sprinkle both sides of chops with pepper. Brown chops on each side in hot skillet. Add apple cider. Cover tightly; cook over low heat for 5-6 minutes or until chops are just done. Drain off juices. In a small bowl combine cranberry sauce, honey, orange juice concentrate, ginger and nutmeg. Pour over chops. Cook for 1-2 minutes, until heated through.

Prep Time: 5 min Cook Time: 12 min Total time: 17 min

Makes 4 servings: 220 calories per serving

(I ate this with fresh steamed green beans. You can probably serve with any vegetable of your choosing).

Who Has Our Back?

So ten days after Proposition 8 was passed by the voters of California, this country has seen protests from the west coast to the east coast; churches have been vandalized; businesses have been boycotted; people have been forced to resign from their jobs; and disturbing packages with white powder have shown up at two LDS Temples.

The LDS church has been unfairly targeted in each of these situations and though the members are beginning to get a little irritated, we have been counseled (as recently as one month ago) to "love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us". I hope each of us is doing just that.

We chose to follow God on this issue and people didn't like it. Many people will never like it. But we have the promise of God that if we stand firm in the face of adversity, we will be blessed. And I believe that even though we have been counseled to not "put up our dukes", Heavenly Father is not going to sit back and let these attacks against His people go unanswered. He might give us persecution to teach us patience and faith, but He will always have our backs.

Making Gravy...

My roommate and I made dinner together on Saturday night, and my job was to make the cream sauce for our swedish meatballs. It was looking a little lumpy and my roommate asked the question, "Does your gravy turn out lumpy too?" I laughed and said "Actually, I've never made gravy".

What?!?! Camille has never made gravy!?!?!?

That's right friends, I have never made gravy from scratch (gravy packets don't count, do they?). My roommate couldn't believe I'd never made gravy before and I said,

"I know. Can you imagine what it will be like after I'm married and I have to call my mom and ask her how to make gravy?"

{I pretend to pick up the phone and dial my mom}

"Hi mom, can you tell me how to make gravy?" and she'll say "Camille, you are 35 years old. You should know how to do this by now."

I guess my roommate thought I was being too optimistic because she changed my mom's response to, "Camille, you are 60 years old, you should know how to do this by now!"

Our Times...

My sister emailed me this quote that she found on her friend's blog the other day. I hope neither of them care that I am stealing it for my own blog, but I found it quite interesting and quite prophetic, seeing as the talk was given 30 years ago.

'Make no mistake about it, brothers and sisters, in the months and years ahead, events are likely to require each member to decide whether or not he will follow the First Presidency. Members will find it more difficult to halt longer between two opinions. President Marion G. Romney said, many years ago, that he had 'never hesitated to follow the counsel of the Authorities of the Church even though it crossed my social, professional or political life.'

'This is hard doctrine, but it is particularly vital doctrine in a society which is becoming more wicked. In short, brothers and sisters, not being ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ includes not being ashamed of the prophets of Jesus Christ. . . . Your discipleship may see the time when such religious convictions are discounted. . . . This new irreligious imperialism seeks to disallow certain opinions simply because those opinions grow out of religious convictions.

'Resistance to abortion will be seen as primitive. Concern over the institution of the family will be viewed as untrendy and unenlightened....Before the ultimate victory of the forces of righteousness, some skirmishes will be lost. Even in these, however, let us leave a record so that the choices are clear, letting others do as they will in the face of prophetic counsel. There will also be times, happily, when a minor defeat seems probable, but others will step forward, having been rallied to rightness by what we do. We will know the joy, on occasion, of having awakened a slumbering majority of the decent people of all races and creeds which was, till then, unconscious of itself. Jesus said that when the fig trees put forth their leaves, 'summer is nigh.' Thus warned that summer is upon us, let us not then complain of the heat.'

--- Elder Neal A. Maxwell, BYU Devotional Address "Meeting the Challenges of Today", October 10, 1978

Total Darkness...

This is what it looked like in my office yesterday when the power went out.

Because our office is in the basement and there are no windows, it can be a little disorienting when the power goes out. But the plus side is that because we couldn't see a thing, we didn't have to work for about 40 minutes!

In the words of my co-worker: WOO-HOO!!!

John Hopkins?

Here is a picture of my brother-in-law John:


Here is a picture of a young(er) Anthony Hopkins:


No matter how many times I ask my mom if she thinks John looks like Anthony Hopkins, she always says no. But every time I see Anthony Hopkins, I see John. My younger sister can see the similarities as well, but so far we are the only two in our family who sees them. I know they don't look identical, but there is just something there that looks so similar. Do any of you see it? Sometimes I think it's the eyes. Other times I think it's the mouth and chin. What do you think?