Ryan and Me: The Prologue

Editor's Note: This is a story of faith, patience and determination. It is a story that has already changed two lives and has the ability to change many more. It is for this reason I have chosen to share it now (with Ryan's permission and his help.)

The Prologue:

Ryan and I met at work. He is the Network Support guy over all the Student Affairs offices on campus. He is the guy who wanders in and out of said offices fixing people's computers. We didn't intially start off as friends right away. It took six years before that happened.

In all honesty, I had never really thought much of Ryan. He was a nice guy but he was definitely not my type. When I first started my job seven years ago, what I knew of him consisted of this: He had hair nearly as long as Rapunzel that he kept neatly contained in a ponytail down his back; he drank coffee and alcohol, both of which I don't drink due to my faith; he was into heavy metal, which I can't stand because, to me at least, it sounds more like chaos than it does actual music; he wasn't LDS, as far as I knew, and he was married. Because of these things, I had pretty much written him off completely.

Fast forward about three years. One day he came in to help me with my computer and I noticed he was no longer wearing a wedding ring. By this point our conversations consisted of us saying hello to each other if we passed in the hall but nothing more. We really weren't friends. Therefore, I didn't feel it was my place to ask about his now ringless finger. But I did assume he was no longer married. I realized then that I really knew nothing about him and I began to wonder what his "story" must be. But then all those thoughts were quickly brushed aside because I knew it didn't matter. We came from two completely different worlds. We'd never be friends.

Then one day, about a year after that, we had a fire drill at work. My co-worker and I decided to head to the library to return some books. When we walked back to our building everyone was sitting outside waiting for the firemen to give the all-clear. We passed by Ryan and both of us had to do a double-take. He had chopped off his hair and looked like a completely different person! I remember thinking, "Wow, he's kind of cute!" but, he was still not LDS as far as I knew and, therefore, someone I still could not date. So I brushed that thought aside and continued on.

In December 2009 I went to a Festivus celebration my work puts on every year. I was sitting at a table with a co-worker when Ryan walked up and asked if he could sit with us. I would describe this as our first "real" conversation (where we said more than two words to each other) but I would also describe it as slightly awkward at first. I hardly knew him and though I did think he was cute, I had no idea what to say to him. Remember how we had nothing in common? What on earth were we supposed to talk about? Well, we talked a little about what we'd each be doing over our Christamas break. I believe he mentioned that he might go to Oregon to visit a friend. Other than that, I can't recall much of what we talked about. I do remember feeling an attraction towards him but I still had that voice in my head telling me that it could never work. So again, I brushed the thought aside and continued on.

At the end of May 2010 I went to a retirement reception for his boss. I had been sitting with a couple of my co-workers when one of them leaned over to me and asked if I knew how old Ryan was. I said I wasn't sure but figured he was probably in his early thirties. She said she knew someone she wanted to line him up with and isntantly I felt myself go tense. "No!" I thought to myself. I was surprised by my own reaction and once again started to brush it aside but then the thought came to me, "You need to get to know him better."

I didn't understand it. I didn't know what to make of it. But it was there as clear as day, "You need to get to know him better." Well, during all of this I kept glancing over at Ryan. He caught me looking at him so to alleviate my embarrassment, I made a funny face. He stood and walked over to me and said, "Did you want something? You were practically staring me down!" I responded with, "Oh...we were just checking you out!" At that point one of my other co-workers started talking to him and nothing more was said between the two of us.

We never had the opportunity to really talk that day but that thought never left me. No matter how hard I tried to brush it aside like all the other thoughts I'd had over the past six years, this one would not leave.